Wednesday, April 30, 2008

My husband really knows how to cheer up my spirits. Yesterday I was feeling antsy about chemo. It has gotten to the point where I need to take a lorazepam before leaving the house and another right before the meds are injected. However, last night Tim showed me this video that had me rolling with laughter. I wanted to share it with all of you along with the tip of the day. The tip is not to look at the sky with an open mouth. Now watch the clip. http://www.yourdailymedia.com/media/1201436323/Local_Bird_Infestation

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

YES! YES! and YES! I get my last treatment tomorrow. I am so happy. Yes I am already anticipating the yucky side-effects but this is it. I am assuming that radiation is a must but I won’t get that confirmation until the middle of May.

Can I just say that I love my kids. They crack me up. For instance, the other night Jacinda was telling me that she is not tired. No matter how much she begged and whined she was not changing my mind. Well during family prayer, she fell asleep. Tim and I looked at each other and just started laughing. It was so funny. Then today Jacinda is carting around 2 barbies (she claims that they are her “babies.”). She is sitting next to me as I am changing McCabe’s diaper and says, “my babies are cold.” The next thing I know, she has a pair of McCabe’s pants wrapped around her barbies. She has deemed McCabe’s pants as a sleeping bag for her barbies. Once again I just started laughing. I love her imagination and sweetness to take such good care of her “babies.”

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

First let me say, "happy birthday Mimi." (She is my sister.) I am having a good beginning of the week. Natalie, my other sister is a big help watching the kids and cleaning the house. Tim is taking me to a show in Seattle on Thursday. I am really excited because they serve a 5 course meal and do a show.

Now the real reason for posting today's blog is to share this good laugh. Check out this blog http://listoftheday.blogspot.com/2007/09/great-olan-mills-photos.html I guarantee you will have a smile on your face.

Saturday, April 19, 2008

(My family out enjoying the gorgeous weather)

Oh I am so excited. Just one more chemo treatment left. I thought this moment would never come. I can feel the strength returning to my body. It is amazing what this cancer experience has done to me. One thing in particular is that I started contacting friends that I have not spoken to in 10 years. We all went our different ways and had families or found careers. Well I decided to check up on some of them to see how they are doing. (Just because there was a time span of silence doesn’t mean I stop thinking about them.) It was great to see what has happened over the years. One works at BYU another is studying to become a lawyer, and another is a doctor in electrical engineering. Some have families others are still searching for the right companion. You know having friends makes time more precious and mortality a worthwhile experience.

These past 3 days I have been sleeping so much. I get about 15 hours of sleep a day. I think the tiredness is finally wearing off. Uncle Doug and Aunt “niece” are watching my babies. I am very excited to get them back today. When they come home, I am going to kiss their faces off!!

This week my sister Natalie (my sister from Texas) is coming. This will be fun. She is big into interior design. I am hoping she can give me some good ideas so I can have something to think about in my spare time.

Sunday, April 13, 2008

This past week was a roller coaster. In the beginning of the week I was sick with a virus. It made my throat and ears sore. I also had a bad cough and lost my voice. Towards the end of the week I felt good except my voice sounded froggy and I still have a little cough. I am reading a great little book that is giving me a lot of optimism. It is one of those Chicken Noodle Soup for the Soul except it is geared toward cancer survivors. I love it because it reminds me that the mind is a very powerful tool when it comes to healing and triumphing over personal health battles. I am starting to look at having cancer in a different way. It really helps that I only have 2 more treatments, one more after this Wednesday. (By the way, thanks to whomever sent this book. Could you also identify yourself? I would like to know who sent it.)

I would like to give an update on the kids but I can’t remember much from this week (blame it on the chemo brain). Oh I do remember that Jacinda did discover silly putty and loves it. She thinks it is a new kind of play-dough. McCabe is still as cute as can be. I have enjoyed rocking him to sleep. Each night I would hold him and rock him in the glider. He puts his head against my chest and eventually falls asleep. This is a precious moment I don’t ever want to miss.

My sister Roxanne and her family came up for a few days. It was fun having her around and the kids. The house was very busy and the kids very active. It was very enjoyable to hear the laughter and the playing. Kids are amazing. They see the world in such a different light. I love seeing what simple things are important to them.

Monday, April 7, 2008

I am hoping I'm on the uphill of recovery. I have 2 left and it gets harder and harder to take the treatments. Last Monday I started crying because I knew that I was going to get chemo and that I was going to feel sick. However, this last chemo treatment was a little different. I met someone from Longview. Katie is a young lady (younger than me) and she just discovered cancer in her leg. She gets 3 treatments (lucky girl versus my 8!!). We swapped phone numbers and she is experiencing the yucky side-effects for the first time. This whole experience has made me think that life is some-what hard to live when your health is compromised. My biggest complaint this week is a dry mouth. I need to smother everything in a sauce or a liquid. It is an odd feeling to have.

This whole cancer ordeal is rarely affecting Jacinda. I think she is still too young to understand. She just keeps on living and enjoys putting band-aids wherever there is a scratch, bruise, or red-mark on her body. I think she went through 5 of them today. It is definitely time to find a new hiding spot for those things. Tim has the hardest job of all, he has to put up with me. All I did these past 4 days was sleep. I can't remember much. I barely remember Sabrina bringing me flowers (which I enjoy very much). Tim gets to cook, clean, and baby-sit. He even said that being a mother is hard work (because he could not clean the garage and watch the kids at the same time). Well it was nice to hear the compliment, but I will be much happier when things are back to normal.

A note to Sasha:

Sasha, I love you and am glad to be by your side.... Albeit it is tough watching you endure the crucial treatments, but if anybody can get through them, SASHA can. Believe you me! Notice how I used the word endure? There are times when we get overwhelmed and can’t see one hour into the future. REMEMBER that what we are experiencing now is but very small piece of time in the tapestry of eternity. There is SO much more that we have to do before we can have the thought of giving up. I know at times I can be a grouchy 30 something year old boy but I do need and appreciate you. You are what gives me joy, growth, inspiration, and direction in my life. We have worked to hard not to be able to enjoy the fruits of our labors. Hang in there and know that someday we will reflect on the tremendous growth and bonding we have both experienced by enduring this challenge. I love you. Tim