Wednesday, December 20, 2017

Wednesday, December 20, 2017

      I got the honor to write my dad's obituary.  He did not want one but we wanted to celebrate his life.  Below is a copy of what I wrote.
Myron Ray Nalder, son of Joseph and Helen Williams Nalder.  Born January 25, 1938 in Ogden, Utah and died December 13, 2017 in Las Vegas, Nevada.  Myron was the oldest of four children.  He was raised in Ogden, served a LDS mission in the Brussels/France Mission, and married Linda Blackham on March 29, 1970.  After Linda’s passing, he married Gigi Johnson on October 25, 2008.
Dad did not want an obituary, but it would be so “uncouth” to dismiss such a character without some sort of commemorative tribute. So just as you would start all our family trips with the roll call, “Fire One!”  Well here comes “fire two, three, and so forth.”  This is a tribute to you dad from all your children.
You were a scholar of books and loved to read.  You reveled in expanding your vernacular and imposing it on your children. 
You were a fine connoisseur of cars with an affinity towards the Ford Tarus, especially the ones with the weakest of transmissions.
You loved listening to classical music and working in the yard.  If there was ever a house or yard project, you had a roll of duct tape nearby to do the job.
You had no time for ignominy for you loved dancing in the grocery store to elevator music or whistling “Zip-a-Dee-Doo-Dah” out loud for all to hear. 
You had a fashion sense that would rival any designer.  You sported hot pink pants long before the color “pink” became cool to wear.  Your festive tradition of wearing a green and red plaid wool suit to church around Christmas time set you a bar above the rest.  But I think the favorite was the “hang loose” clam diggers you wore while doing yard work.  Those pants just screamed “Myron.” 
If you could surround yourself with food, the staples would be nuts, cherry cordials, big orange circus peanuts, Necco wafers, nips, ice cream, and an occasional drink of “scuzz.”
During the bitter cold Utah winters, you kept the basement fire stove going even to the point where the sides glowed orange and the room was too hot to enter.
As your daughters got older and more “fair,” you often told them to blacken a tooth and put a brick on their heads to keep the boys away. 
“How are my babes! How are my babes!” Is what you would say when you wanted to know how your grandchildren were doing.  When the grandchildren came to visit, you would take them in your arms and go outside to have them shake the trees.
If a birthday slipped your mind a time or two, we always knew you loved us. You taught us that “wisdom is more precious than rubies,” and to be “heavy on the love.”
You will be missed but your legacy will continue to thrive through 6 children, 19 grandchildren, and one wife.  You will be laid to rest at a graveside service in Farmington, Utah Friday, December 22, 2017 at 11:00 am. 

Tuesday, December 19, 2017

Tuesday, December 19, 2017

It is hard to explain how I am feeling.  There are a lot of emotions that surround me.  My father passed away Wed. 12/13/2017.  I was not expecting this for a few more months.  I am glad that he is not suffering but I am sad that both of my parents are gone from this Earth.  There was comfort in knowing that I could call dad any time and he would answer.  Now I am left feeling empty and orphaned.  I rely a lot on Tim and my work.  Tim is there to hold me when I breakdown in tears.  My job keeps me focused on other things and allows me to get out and be productive.  I have to admit that I am surprised by all the support and prayers.  People have been so good to me and my family.  I love my ward and my friends.  They are priceless.
The grave side will be Friday.  Dad will be buried next to mom in the Farmington, Utah cemetery.  I hope they had a good reuniting in heaven.  It will be exciting to see if they are a little different in heaven than on earth. 
The kids are taking the death well.  Of course they were not really close to my dad, but my dad sure loved them.  I will miss the flashlights wrapped in a $10 bill he gave each year for Christmas.  That was always a fun tradition.  Every time I see one of those dollar store flashlights around the house, I think of my dad.  A few things I remember about my dad are: loving milk chocolate cherry cordials, necco wafers, pink pepp-o-mints, always saying, “heavy on the love.”  I swear his favorite scripture was proverbs 8:11, “For wisdom is more precious than rubies and nothing you desire can compare with it.”  He always quoted that around the house.  Every time we would leave for a family trip he would say, "fire one," and then the rest of the kids would reply, "fire two," "fire three," and so forth.  He also loved burnt almond fudge ice cream and cranberry juice.  He would buy a large container of juice and to make sure the kids did not drink it, dad would spit a loogie in it.  Dad was also a constant reader.  He loved to read a variety of books.  Sometimes he would go to the dollar store and stock up on books.  He got his library card cut up because he would borrow so many books and never return them.  Most likely because he left his books everywhere.  Dad also loved classical music.  I don’t think he had a favorite composer but he would spend hours listening to Bach, Beethoven, Mozart, Vivaldi, etc…  A more contemporary song he liked was “Send in the Clowns.”
Dad was also one of the cheapest men I knew.  Once when we were going to Disneyland he gave a speech about how we can buy all the candy and goodies we wanted.  It didn’t matter if it was junk food.  Then he proceeds to hand each of us a dollar.  He was creative in his own right.  Once he made a floatation device out of bubble wrap and duct tape…..and used a variety of methods to insulate the house (Styrofoam, plastic, reflective wrap).  I also a remember a time he was blending laundry detergent in the blender.  His reasoning is to make smaller granules which causes the product to be more concentrated so he can use less.
Once when I was a child, he woke me up and took me to Bowmans.  He looked in the dumpster behind the store and found the perfect cardboard box.  He brought it home and built a little stand for me.  He then gave me a bunch of Century 21 yellow balloons to sell on the side of the street in front of our house.  It was pretty cool.  It was like the stand Lucy from Peanuts had when she was ready to offer her advice.  Dad will greatly be missed.
We are gearing down for Christmas.  It is a fun time of year when everything slams at you all at once.  We are making goodies for the neighbors.  This year Tim suggested peanut brittle to go on the plate with fudge, caramel, and coconut balls.  The kids love taste testing all the treats.  I am totally sugared out. 
Let’s go over the kid’s want list for Christmas.  Jacinda wants a Launch Pad or a drawing tablet.  She is getting the latter.  McCabe wants a plane ticket to Texas to visit Kade.  He is getting money, not a plane ticket.  Xadia wants a stuffed animal.  She is getting a flip-a-zoo that changes from a Husky to a Polar Bear.  Teagan wants M&M’s with a $10 bill.  He is totally getting that.  I love the simple wants of young kids.  Tim is getting an elf costume because he is the best and we love Buddy the elf!



Sunday, December 10, 2017

Sunday, December 10, 2017

     My heart is breaking.  My dad is really sick and it is so hard to see him bed bound.  It is a repeat of my mom.  The last year of her life she was confined to her bed.  My dad is confined to his bed as he deals with brain tumors, blood clots, sepsis, a bladder infection, prostate cancer, and edema.  I was able to visit him during thanksgiving along with Mimi's family.  I got a few moments to talk with dad.  I recorded my conversation.  The room was dark because dad does not like the lights.  He wants to sleep and rest.  I am grateful for his responses to my questions.  I will cherish his answers.

     We are gearing up for the holidays.  As a child, I hated Christmas.  We were poor.  It was a big disappointment to get one present and it was usually a shirt or something that I really needed.  As an adult I love Christmas.  I am trying to teach my kids the true meaning Christmas.  Today was one of those lessons.  Tim has a co-worker who is going through a divorce.  He has 5 kids ages 5 through 14.  We went though all our Christmas decorations and boxed up all the items that were not broken.  We also made some coconut balls, chocolate dipped pretzels and strawberries.  With the boxed decorations and the home made goodies, we surprised his co-worker and made his house a bit more Christmasy.  I am so grateful we have enough to share with others.  I am grateful for the love we have the opportunity to share with others.  God is good.